Cara Marcum is the Program Director at Piatt County Services for Seniors in rural Illinois. She sent me an email last week that started out like this: “Christy, For your book, might I suggest….”

Obviously, I was hooked. I called Cara to discuss her email and she graciously gave me an hour of her time for an interview.

Her very best advice? “Just ask [for help]! It may be hard, but it’s important.”

Christy,

For your book, might I suggest a section that addresses the tools to help tackle the paperwork challenges of caregivers for their loved one? I work at Piatt County Services for Seniors, which is a SHIP-certified (Senior Health Insurance Program) that serves seniors, disabled individuals and their families (who are often the caregivers and caretakers of reams of paperwork on their behalf).

Cara goes on to share lots of Illinois-specific information, which I’m happy to pass on to you by request. The larger part of the conversation is that both of us are in a position to see people not getting the help they need (even when it’s readily available) because they don’t know it even exists! (Grrrrrr)

Like me, Cara speaks pretty much any place that’ll have her. Crisscrossing through rural communities, she’s at health fairs, chambers of commerce, serving on committees, whatever she can think of to make sure people know her organization exists and is there to help. Cara makes it a practice to leave brochures and business cards behind wherever she goes, just in case someone happens upon it who could use the help.

Oh, and she sings in a choir because that has outreach potential, too. (Yes, Cara is a real person! She’s just that awesome.)

Cara emailed me after she’d just helped a (senior) wife of a man living with advanced dementia in a skilled nursing facility muddle through yet one more stress-inducing piece of paper (that, it turns out, shouldn’t have been sent to her in the first place).

As you know, it’s difficult enough to manage the stress of being a primary care partner. Not knowing where to turn for help when you’re feeling blitzed by paperwork is just more salt in the wound. The level of overwhelm can get so high so quick that action paralysis can grab hold. And feeling low.

When people need help, and the help they need is available but they don’t get it, we call that a barrier to service. What could be keeping people from getting the (available) help they need?

Cara says she thinks it’s people not wanting to ask for help. She sees families who’ve done the best they could in taking care of a loved one, but maybe didn’t have all the information they needed, or resources, and now feel embarrassed about the job they’ve done, or ashamed they didn’t do better.

This is where Cara says (and I completely agree), “Just ask! It’s hard, but it’s important.” We really do just want to make sure you get the help you need.

Here are some ways you can get help with a variety of needs you may have in your situation:

Unless you’ve got oodles of time on your hands and love geek-speak (or are a policy wonk), avoid the National Association of Area Agencies on Aging website. It’s a sinkhole of frustration just waiting to suck you in. Instead, find your local Area Agency on Aging office in the US by putting in your state and county. The information will appear below your inputs. (Don’t be put off by the title of the page, “Paying for Senior Care.”)

Canada appears quite a bit slicker in ease of finding relevant information. Start with the Public Health Agency of Canada for a broad overview, or go here to find province-specific information, or to the National Seniors Council website.

Age UK offers straightforward information and is my favorite site of all I checked out, both for ease of use and lack of geek-speak. Well done, UK! Being an American, I’ve no idea how Age UK is or is not affiliated with NHS; it looks like it may be a separate organization to me.

The Australian Government Department of Social Services website appears at first glance to have been abandoned about 18 months ago but hasn’t yet been booted off a Google search. The good news is, I found this (new?) version, and it’s far better! It’s plain but easy and helpful, which is the point.

Back to the US. Cara says,

“Staff at these offices can refer a senior to an office where they can receive help with Medicare/Medicaid paperwork, insurance questions, medical billing questions, enrolling in Medicare Part D plans, newly enrolled Medicare participant decisions, assist with eligibility and obtaining assistive equipment, Low Income Heating & Electrical Assistance Program(LiHEAP), general financial assistance, food assistance, help with locating affordable housing, etc.

Another piece of advice Cara offered (that never would’ve occurred to me), no matter where you live: check out Facebook! For example, Piatt County Cares is a Facebook group that posts needs in the community for seniors in dire straights, such as for roofing, plumbing, and funeral services. People in the community and vendors of such services are able to donate and connect through the group.

And, as always…

Remember that I’m here for you, I’m rooting for you, and you’re always welcome to reach out!